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I had to present an essay in my 9th grade English class and I didn't do it. So to get out of presenting it that day I put a pencil in my pants and told the teacher I couldn't do it today. When she asked why I stood up with my pencil boner and said I have a "hardy" right now. My teacher had a mini panic attack told me to sit down quickly. The class was almost in tears as I had just pulled off one of the greatest "get out of homework schemes" anyone has ever pulled off.
Story of my life... *sigh*