Comments
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@Gay Closet Monster, Don't get the wrong idea about my relationship with little Billy, though. I've grown accustomed to watching him live and it's given me a great opportunity to possibly make a human friend. Plus, I don't need his pinky toe because I have many other victims for my active love life. Stop laughing, I'm being serious! I have been with many other monsters! Why won't anyone believe me when I say that? Ugh that's another thing I hate about humans. They are so judgmental of foreign species. So what if I live in a closet? At least I don't have to pay bills or have sex! ...Oh wow, look at the time already. Little Billy will be home from school soon, so I should probably put his iPad back where I found it. Wouldn't want him whining to his parents about his room being haunted again.
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@Gay Closet Monster, you sir have made my day
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@Gay Closet Monster, You remind me of a mild Scary Mike..
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@Gay Closet Monster, shut up and take my upvote!
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@Gay Closet Monster, Monster, I applaud you, it takes great bravery to live in a closet and be an outsider. I only know the latter, since I have lived for quite a while. But you and I are not so different, I live in a coffin and reproduce by offering my bites to virgins, okay, a little different, but you get the idea. Follow your dreams.
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@Gay Closet Monster, I like you. A lot.
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@Gay Closet Monster, so tell me more about your relationship with little billy
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@Gay Closet Monster, MOAR!
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@Gay Closet Monster, i know what it's like to be judged, man. mortals are so cruel.
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I found doodoo in my closet again today. I keep thinking it was my puppy, but then I remember mommy told me he ran away..
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Best part is, you'll miss every red light!
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They'll always miss their exit
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I was gonna comment on something about saints row but its hard to compete with that long comment oh well I'm posting this anyways
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GIF: Negative
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But it will always get hit by others
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@18bluecat, is that lead to a paradox?
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@diglet, great grammar Mr. English Major
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But it will always die for no reason.
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It's peanut butter jelly time!!
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If you you look to the right you will see a red car blowing up
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Hit the brakes! I missed! NOOO, "explodes"
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Yet it will explode on impact when it hits a tree.
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Ikr! STAR WARS PUN!!!!'
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Now if it was Star Trek themed and red, it'll be like driving a Ford Pinto. Instant death.
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But the top will hit if you try to enter a parking garage
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I find your lack of breaks disturbing.
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I want this. A lot.
Journal entry #1 Wow, this is a big moment for me. It's my official first journal entry. I'll be honest, I thought this stuff was kind of gay (ironic, right?) but it really allows me to display my feelings. Anyway, there are many, many topics that simply perplex me about human culture. Today I had to experience first-hand probably the most confusing to me. I never understood why you humans desire sex so much. It's even odd how you humans engage in the act of sex. From an outsiders point of view, it really looks like it hurts for both of you. With all of the moaning, screaming, crying, and painful positions you engage in, I'm surprised it's so popular in the human culture. When a closet monster loves another closet monster, we do not hurt our significant other. The male monster is required to offer the female a special gift. Specifically, the pinky toe of a human child. Sure, it's a little barbaric, but so is pounding the organ that is necessary for producing offspring into mince meat.