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"I'm going to steal the Declaration of Independence."
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@I shjt you not, You gotta be shjtting me !?!
@I shjt you not, I love you
@I shjt you not, You mean burn it?
@Eu west is Eu best, thanks,
If anyone is questioning whether they should read this because of the length I recommend that you do
@Bus Full of Kids, I concur with this yellow consumer of children.
@Bus Full of Kids, best decision I made all day
@Fellacio Jones, "yellow consumer of children" - amazing.
@Bus Full of Kids, is there more?
I read the whole thing in like an old timey secret agent voice.
@Stealthytwinkie, I read it in GOB's voice from Arrested Development.
Props to her for not running away screaming.
@I Punt Pugs, from her phone?
This thing is great when read in Jason Statham's voice
@Darkspawn666, Or Will Arnett's
@Darkspawn666, or Morgan Freeman's
#bestofthebest
@Barnacle MAN,
For her not to cut him off right there this must be acted out or he must look like Ryan Gossling.
This is the best text conversation I've ever read.
I actually met the girl I'm currently dating on Tinder
@Sexy Homunculus, explain
@Missgeekgirl, we both liked each other on Tinder, met in person, and now we're dating. I know Tinder's known for being the hookup app, but I prefer using it to actually meet people.
You know it's a good post when (so far) not even the comments are downvoted.
*Wesson
@Hubert Farnsworth, This one thing annoyed me so much...
@Hank the Hamster, thank goodness I'm not the only one
@Hank the Hamster, "Some people need to get their facts straight!" -Blonic
Worth it.
I could tell this guy was strange from the moment he used two "hello"s
This made my day!
I feel like he's quoting something...
"PULL WHAT OFF" #your clothes
So this is what it's like to read pure gold…*smiles with tear in eye* not as good as they say…just a million times better
Read it twice just cuz
#storytime
The Salamander
29 March 2014 #29March2014
It was when he defined lactose intolerant that I lost it.
I like this but I wish I understood it
This guy. I hang out with people like this guy.
Ill show you what ill pull off...
This sounds eerily similar to Mr. Taco...
Wtf
When he said I have pink hair tall and in a disguise I was like Natsu?
Dwight shrute is trying to catch a date
This man deserves everything there is to give.
Omg I freaking wish my friends or anybody would text me somethi n g like this .. it would be so epic
This throws a wrench in our plan, Brookfields
Did anybody else get the punchline?
#Ishjtyounot
I actually thought this was something about twilight
"How do YOU Tinder?"
"I'm going to steal the Declaration of Independence."