Comments
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@I shjt you not, Hey!!!
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@I shjt you not, I've got a wall... I guess I can throw that.
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@I shjt you not, I have a built redhead dude
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@I shjt you not, i have toilet paper
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@I shjt you not, I have a sword on my left right now, I win!
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Well I guess I'm beating him with my pants and tank top! DIE FOUL BEAST I SHALL STRIKE YOU DOWN WITH THE POWER OF THE PANTS!!!! Among other things...
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@I shjt you not, i just like how everyone has to say i shjt you nots user name and it makes us all sound like were really excited about what we have.
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@bubbles the stripper, nice
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Well guess my dogs gonna have too bite his face before he gets mine!
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@I shjt you not, dude I got Cotten balls on a scale of 1-10 I'm very fcked
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@Cpzombie, As do I; I have my saber right here(it's a saber used for fencing, but it still works XD)
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@I shjt you not, I have a B̨̥̣͇̭ͦ̓̾̒̈́ͤ̀̓͝ạ͎̹͙͓̠̹͙ͯnͦ̔̐̊͒͞͏̦̣̭̣̖͍a͎͍̖̘͍̬͉̳̽̅̌̂͞ņ̧̺̥̫̤̣͍͓̘ͦ͟a̓҉̶̰̳
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*Looks at hands* Which one is my left?!?!?! Somebody tell me!!!
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@R0n1n21, the one you don't fap with
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@TreeOctopus, except for those lucky few who can charge two watches at the same time
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@Deadpoolfist , At the same time? So he has two?
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@Presidents Bodyguard, maybe it is extraordinarily long
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@Deadpoolfist , Come on, lets be realistic. That's really long, which is more likely?
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@Presidents Bodyguard, or both arms are weak and they swap after 2 minute intervals
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@TreeOctopus, unless he's left handed like me
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I'll plunger the hell out of his brain
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@Macatak, Always works on dead rising. Go for it!
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@Macatak, stapler I'm safe
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Toilet paper? Yeah I'm screwed!
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@The Fact Sphere, lol i have a tissue box
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@The Fact Sphere, looks like I'm beating him into oblivion with.....my puppy. am I allowed to pick something else?
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@The Fact Sphere, *looks left sees pentagram* yeah hes going down
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@The Fact Sphere, I've got toilet paper too. Let's team up!
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My sister
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@Patter, 'I shjt you not' already threw her
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@Draco MaIfoy, I laughed at that more than I should considering we're talking about my sister
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@Patter, #firebended
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@Draco MaIfoy, OH DAMN!! Don't worry Patter, I had already paid her.
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@Patter, #burnoftheyear
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@Patter, you must sacrifice the weak so the strong will live
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@Ice Deliverer, Dude, you had so much potential just then with that username!
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My cat?? Challenge accepted...
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Go, dinosaur sippy cup, go
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Toilet paper? Sh!t's going down
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@rumpelstiltskin, I see what you did there...
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Dead rising finally comes in handy! Time to put this dildo to use
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@Sir rufflebottom, dildo launcher!!
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@Sir rufflebottom, dildo bat. Thanks for the idea saints row
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My Spanish vocab, helpful.
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@CSC, I guess you could bore it to death...?
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A 2kg tub of protein powder. I'm about to give that zombie the work out of it's unlife.
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I WILL SMITE HIM WITH MY SOFA OF COMFY
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@The 22nd Doctor, you... I like you...
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My wife...meh...I'm good. He'll be to full to eat me.
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A blanket
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Sooooo how would I throw a wall???
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@Jar Of Dirt, You'll need some muscle first.
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I actually have a replica Elucidator and Dark Repulser sitting together to my left, so that zombie is screwed.
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@Paper, I to have a sword to my left
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I have a gun safe do I use the guns or the safe
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@Firehose, Why not both*Mexican music plays*
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A Bat'leth. FVCK YEAH!
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I got a pretzel stick. Let's do this sh!t.
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Throw my kid and run
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Lol a wallet! I'll bribe him.
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My penis will do
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@BabaBooey, I take it you too are on the toilet.
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@King Maximilian, no
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@BabaBooey, Boy, that escalated quickly.
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Looks like this zombie is going to get a face full of SI Swimsuit magazines...
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So I have a stuffed angry bird toy... I guess I could launch it at the zombie.
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A pillow... But if it was to my right I'd be okay. Lava lamps can cause some serious brain damage.
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Very screwed there's a screwdriver next to me *ba dum tss* okay I'll show myself out
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*throws my pudgy french bulldog* best I got
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Hell yes in bed with a baseball bat beside me
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@Typhoon222, Why? Just... Why?
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@asmb100, anythings a dildo if your brave enough
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An ice pickaxe?
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A loaded shotgun? Well thats convenient.
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Fvck, I got tin foil
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A baby bouncer
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A shovel. I can dig it
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... *Throws cat at him*
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Walking dead replica sword. F*ck yeah!
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Guitar amp.
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#DracoMalfoy
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I have a chair... I'm going to live!!!!
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Toilet roll GO!
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I shall strangle him with my blanket
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A stuffed unicorn....shiiiiiit
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Nintendo ds
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A replica of the World Heavyweight championship.... It worked in the Rock.
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Oh well... Pillow fight!!!
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Every damn time I see these, I am laying in bed and a freaking pillow is my weapon.
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Lovely, I get to throw my teddy bear. How useful.
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Gallon jug of Arizona tea... I'm screwed
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*Throws mom*
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My weapon is a garden hose
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I have Doritos..?
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I have a garbage can... *puts upside down on top of zombie* problem solved?
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Toothpaste to the rescue
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Lamp.
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@MANTHEHARPOON, but... I love lamp.
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@SpaghettiCunt, but do you reeeeeeealy love lamp
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Dumb bell I think I'll be ok
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A bowl of cookie dough. I'll warm his heart with deliciousness?
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My 2 year old sister ... I think I win
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A towel. A freaking towel. I am very screwed.
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Refrigerator...
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A Wendy's Double. I hope he likes extra pickles.
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I only have one shot with this football then
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My 8 month old
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@Blue Caterpillar, you know what to do
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Dove moisturiser, I'm screwed...
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A bowl full of water hmmm better chuck it and hope he's a witch
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@Penface, why exactly do you have a bowl of water
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@Imaginedragons, cats?
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@Penface, if its a witch then we burn her!
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Dildo....
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Vibrator?
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A wii remote...
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A pillow. God damn it
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A bag..... Im screwed!!!
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I have a mic on my headset
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A metal fork.
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Lol i dont think a bag of chips and water will suffice
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I have a door rug. I will win this.
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Okay lotion and tissue box here's your time to shine.
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A jizz rag...
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Snickers....he'll change into a friendly one that I put on a leash so that I blend in with the zombies...
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I know, I'll choke him out with my usb cord!
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My shower curtain...great.
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To the left teddy bear to the right shotgun dang
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A SH!T TON OF CACTI! BRING IT ON!
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Nerf sword
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Object to my left is a book of black magic spells I think I'm good.
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What am I gonna do with a filing cabinet?
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Well I'm in my organic chemistry lab and there's a bottle of concentrated sulfuric acid to my left.... It might work
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Railroad spike and an oil heater, I'm pretty confident in those weapons...
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Oh god my PS3 controller
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A bowling ball. STRIKE!
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Well I'm gonna have a zombie pillow fight.
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I'm in the car. To my left is the door... *rips door off hinges*
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Horse lamp?
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Ahh pillow, we end how we started today, with you murdering zombies
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My M134 Minigun? Because 'Murica
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I am holding a pencil.
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A Nokia phone. I'm good with this
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Special K pastry crisps
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I'm good, my kinesiology book will bore him to death
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A paper shredder. Come at me, zombie scum!
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Pickled onion monster munch! Rub that sh!t in his cuts! Winner!
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Wiener dog
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It's a blanket but I guess I could throw it over his face and run away. After I fvck everything of course
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Haha, I have a sonic screwdriver! Lol
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I don't think pillow cases will save me...
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Pretty screwed consider my classmate may not want to be a weapon.
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Does it have to be to my left? To my left are oven mitts, what the heck am I supposed to do with oven mitts??? But to my right is a chainsaw...
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@drawAline2UandMe, why the fvck is your kitchen in the garage. Bitch better be grilling.
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Well im fvcked im in solitary confinement
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@Dartmaster720, so did you suitcase the phone you're using at the moment?
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@lemmiwinks, maybe dont rat me out
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The chick that's to my left better have a gun or something.
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My ka-bar knife? I think I'm good
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I have a sword...
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@natzu, I have a sword too!
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Im at a barber, its hair
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Dead homeless guy with needles sticking out his arm...
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Is mayonnaise a weapon? No Patrick mayonnaise is not a weapon
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A door. But...He just busted it down. Fack
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I got my bed sheets...
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To my left is a couple of samori swords, I think I'll be fine
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Fairy tail celestial spirit keys!!!
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Sweet my Smith and Wesson M&P 15 I'm all good
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A chair
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Xbox control
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Paper cut that dude to death, with my birthday card of power!!!!
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Nasal tissue! FEAR THE TISSUE!
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A 17 year old girl on my bus? ...lets not. Her backpack could help though! :D
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Well on my left is the ceiling so I'm either completely screwed or... Yah I'm screwed
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All I have is my teddy bear...
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I've got a badass dagger to my left. I've got this.
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Pillow Fight!!!!!!!
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Great I'll use this 2x4. Why I have it here? I have no clue
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My mother.
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Well 90% of people will either end up with a shower curtain or toilet paper as their weapon...
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I have a fan a chair and computer witch to choose
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A recliner... The zombie is fvcked beyond belief
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I CANT THROW THIS WALL. FVCK
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.44 mag is under my night stand... It's to my left, does that count?
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No kidding, machete. Im prepped for this very situation.
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Earrings...
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I got a remote
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Yo I have an alarm clock that will knock him out in the nick of time! Ha! Haha! Ha....ha...guys?
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Pillow... "Facepalm"
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I am in my car, so my door? If that doesn't count, I have a bush. I'm pretty screwed.
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Baby bottle. FUUUUU-
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I guess I could just throw my cat at him.
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Oh darn just my grandfather well he is a veteran
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A bottle of beer fvck yeah!!
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My fist....my dream is to fight a zombie in hand to hand combat!
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A box of tissues
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@Not tellin, *insert mr bean face*
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Nachos...
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This jar of honey should slow him down... Why can't I just use the handgun on my right?
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Well my small dog is next to me
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Throws bathtub and runs
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A rug
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A sandwhich... well at least it tastes good...
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Ohh some toilet paper. What will I make him a mummy
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I am good. I have a .45 Cal pistol next to me.
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I have a bag of haribo starmix, I feel I may be the one bursting through your door at some point
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Pillow... Put it in his face and knock him over. Start kicking his head in. Didn't say I couldn't use my feet.
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Could illegal liqueur be considered a weapon?
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I guess I'll be b*tch slapping that zombie, cuz my dog (which is female) is lying next to me.
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Whoops sent too early and autocorrect fvcked it up
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I'm right handed, why in zombie hell would I grab something to my left?
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A wall. A motherf caki
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i would have a pen or book
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A pillow? Damn!t!
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A knife... I am so screwed.
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The remote would be my weapon. The real question is "how fast will it take this thing to rip me limb from limb"
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A fridge... Hmm
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Toilet paper. So very.
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OH SHlT SON!! Ima live! I love being the Dragonborn, I have my favorite Machete already in my left hand!
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there's a baby to my left...
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I have a pillow... But I'm a marble so...
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But I love my dog...
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Cinder block wall. I guess I get a cinder block?
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Its a cup
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Um does anyone know how to kill a walker with a granola bar?
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I actually have a katana hanging on my left from when I visited Japan, not that screwed.
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I trust my cat to protect me... "The Calico Warrior"
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My purse. I'm good lol
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well by good chance I just shot him in the head.
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ITS MY PILLOW
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"Here kitty kitty kitty..."
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Paper. Goodbye world
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I have a wall... I'm doomed.
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I got a lamp
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A couch. Sh!ts going down
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Fridge. I win.
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I'm so down with using a bathroom sink
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Well first off, He would be screwed because I just used this "toy" to screw his mom if you know what I mean...... Giggity
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TEddy if you kill this zombie I'll give you a treat!
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My pool cue.
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I have two cold steel katanas on the wall to my left. I'm screwed!
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The heavy wooden bookcase next to my door. Flip that shjt over and I have a barricade!
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Cat with claws... I will survive
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My cat. If she's in the mood to fight then I'm not screwed at all
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A box
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A large dresser drawer, a deadly weapon in the hands of those who are worthy.
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I wonder how well this couch will work
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Cause of death, beat by cat
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Blanket. FFFFFUUUUU
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A wall... Think I'll be fine
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I'll beat him to death with my kitty!
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I have a couch....awesome
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My left hand? Ill be fine.
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A pillow
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A Bowie knife, no joke! =)
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A hair brush
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Since most of us are on the toilet, the objects to our left is toilet paper...
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I got a table!
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It's a plastic spoon in a plate of black beans and rice with spicy rotel tomatoes .-.
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A door
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Co2 airsoft pistol
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My dog...
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Well I'm on the toilet and there is a digital weight scale right next to me... Better use a sharpened tooth brush lol
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A pile of dirty clothes and paints with the belt still on and about 2lbs of stuff in the pockets...
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My cat? I'll take it.
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Hmmmm I have toilet paper to my left
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We'll looks like I gotta beat a motherfvcker with a fridge....
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I think I'm capable of beating a zombie to death with a role of toilet paper...
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I'm fine I have a gun to my left......
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I got a pillow
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A plastic bottle.....
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I'm at work and I have a Bob cat to my left. I think I'll be ok.
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PlayStation controller... I'm fvcked
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A bag of spitz, wonderful
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My penis
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Empty coffee cup, fvck
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A blow torch ?
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I have a knife to my left. Win, I guess?
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Paper. *throws paper at zombie, it decapitates him! Wow, that's one hell of a paper cut!
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A wall.
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A chair, not bad
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Uploader's name how I met your mother reference?
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My cat is sleeping to the left of me... think i'll be fine ^_^ he'll eat that zombie for dinner
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Jokes on you! I can use a wall as a weapon now!
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I just got finished softball practice. My bag is to my left. I have to medal bats.
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@madhattan13, *two or 2
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My dog is not a good weapon, too fluffy.
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I have a table so yeah
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My sister? I'm going to hit one ****** with another ******
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Dog and T.V., fvck yeah
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Very screwed since there is nothing on my left
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My dog that's afraid of toilet paper. Literally.
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Uhhh, toilet paper?
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A tact flip knife... Im all set
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A lamp and a belt hmm this could work
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So I'm going Saints Row on this bitch with The Penetrator
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Dont fail me know laptop!
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... I get a pebble... I'm dead.
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iPad let's go
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An APUSH text book. I'm perfectly okay with this
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Great! Just fvcking great: a wall 😞
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Ceiling fan
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@Lvl 80 paladin, why are you on the ceiling right now
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@Barnacle MAN, he might be on the floor on his right side
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@Supdalat, not necessarily. After all, he IS level 80.
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I have my bow to my right and my alarm clock to the left...
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@Alletaire, a hair bow
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@traveler of time, no a recurve that launches projectiles
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@Alletaire, i am just joshing, i just sold mine, love bows
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@traveler of time, I am also a lover of bows. I course my first bow found out that I got a secondary bow, and ever since our relationship has been spiraling downwards...
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A table.
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If I spread this lube in the floor he'll slip and fall... success.
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1 April 2014 #1April2014
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Pic Rating: 2/10
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Mines a pug..
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Luckily I have my trusted.....backgammon board! Well, that's the end of me.
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My penis....wait, what
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Well I'm in the car...
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A printer?
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Awesome sauce! I just got my cold steel Gladius machete! Perfect.
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I am in a truck and there's an empty gatorade bottle, empty soda can, and half-full gatorade bottle.
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Not my laptop!! NooOoooOoo! I think I'll just let him eat me.
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Am good I got cz75 to my left
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What's Facebook doing here
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I'm not joking, The thing to my left is a flintlock.
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Tape Wow
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I have a pillow. I'm gonna die.
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A sock. Yayz
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I'm gonna beat him with a pillow
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A fvcking pillow again
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A pillow
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I guess I could slap him with a camera right?
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Thanks apple for making some pretty sturdy keyboards...
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I'm good cause I have my 9mm right next to me. Loaded.
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I have my cz75 p0-1 one my left
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TV remote so... Yeah I'm pretty screwed
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A m good I got my cz 75 p0-1 full of 9 mm hallow points
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GUINEA PIGS. ATAAAAAAAACK
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PILLOW FIGHT!!!
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Nothing to my left
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I literally have a genuine katana i got for my birthday, sitting in its open case on my bedside..... I win 😎
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In the gym, dumbell, to my left "I think I'll be fine
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Car scratching post club
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My sleeping girlfriend, huh DISTRACTION SWEET
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My penis
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The only thing to my left is a roof ledge... so suicide it is
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Well your mum is quite a good weapon...
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I have a wardrobe to my left, which looks like the one in Narnia... Cya bjtches, I'm off!
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My little brother... I will live
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Haha, my boyfriend... Sacrifices must be made...
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Good thing im a murican and sleep with all my guns
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All I've got is a curtain. I guess I could blind it and kick it out.
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My mom ftw, I showed her and she said he would be screwed
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An ak47
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My door is the weapon.
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A door.....
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I'm lying on my side *grasps at air*
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Am I the only one that never has anything to my left when one of these show up of funnypics?
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A subway cup
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A belt
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I'll be ok. Im in a truck.
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My cat....
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@RadioactiveAngel, same, but I feel like it be more affective then you think.. Whether he gets eaten or claws him to death, you can run
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Xbox controller
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Well it looks like im gonna fight the zombie apocalypse with a soda can
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A Pringles can. Filled with chips. Welp, better eat them before him!
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I've got a laptop
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My volleyball team
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Yay im not screwed! I got my shotgun *hugs shotgun* you come in handy *laughs* some many puns...
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Bobby pin
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I have my stair bannister. One problem: it's heavy as fvck
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Portal gun replica....WORK DAMMIT YOU WORK....oh wait...
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I've got a pillow...
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Haha my ac machine.
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A fat class mate.
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I actually have a knife
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I can mummify them with my toilet papery goodness
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A pillow.
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...tp
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This is awesome cause there is actually a chainsaw next to me
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My grandmother...I'm fvcked
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Wall, I got this
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A car door! Does that count as the car? Either I will have a sick shield or the best killing machine.
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Hey look a bow :D
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its a bible
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@J0K3R13, Those mother fuc*ers need Jesus
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Do you think garden clippers will do?
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I have a metal baseball bat... and a gun....
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@PhilosoCat, jk about the gun
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My left fist? I'll be fine
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Welp I'm having a pillow fight with a zombie!
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*stabs with sister's barbie* Well that went over smoothlye
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Hand sanitizer. You dirty!! Zombie!!
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My sword. Oh. I think I'll be fine.
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*throws girlfriend* like these pussy
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Well i could use mister wall to defend myself
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Toilet paper roll
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Fortunately I'm cleaning my rifle...
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I got a machete.. i think im good!
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My weapon is toilet paper
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Ive got a window
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I have got 3 things next to me a replica bilbo knife from LOR a strong good lengthed walking stick and a laundry basket yeah i think im good
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A pillow fight with a zombie... This will not end well
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My dog is my weapon. Hm I may actually survive!
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I'm left-handed, so fyck it, I'm going out with a smile and a healthy dose of shame.
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aww not my cat blanket
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#PattersSister
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Lava lamp and alarm clock. I think only partly screwed
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Apparently it's time to duel
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My teddybear.. Yea I'm fvcked
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El blanket.
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Now how the fvck am I supposed to throw a 75 gallon fish tank??
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@Gay Hippopotamus , dump it over and grab the broken glass its simple
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*looks left* *sees empty toilet paper roll* well I'm screwed either way
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I was scratching my beard... So yeah, I think I'm pretty much good.
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Throws BIG friend IT'S WOKING
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Well, seeing how most of us are on the toilet...most aren't in good condition. Mine is a thick shower curtain.
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There are like a thousand people with cats on funnypics
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a ps3 controller
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My clawless cat... I'm screwed
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MY CAT!?
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*proceeds to throw large quantities of toilet paper.*
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Dammit! I've got a fupping pillow! *realizes heroic destiny*
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Table anybody?
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The object to my left is a fvcking wall
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Well that's good considering I have a machete next to me.
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*throws wall and misses*
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Bathtub..I need to build my upper body strength for this
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12 ga. I think nor
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Titan fall collectors statue to the brain
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I'm actually prepared... I have a bat
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I literally just got done priming my .22 lol
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Good thing my cousin Bob Bobington left his nokia on the couch ... I got an account to post on this pic
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I got a lamp, so I am pretty set
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A musical stand, a lamp, and/or a piano... hmmmm decisions decisions...
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Its a good thing I always keep my lazor cannon of death to my left. *misses 80 times and gets eaten anyway.
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A sink. How am I supposed to use a sink.
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I have a wall motha fukas!!!
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We'll my door is what's next to me soo...
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A couch pillow..... Well, I'm dead.
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A knife, yeah! Well if I am correct this is a zombie and zombie hates O- blood and I have O- blood, so I am safe and don't need a weapon.
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Fire ax from a Panama fireman. Nice
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A guitar
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My printer? Hell yeah!
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It's our time to shine mr. chair!
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Couch? Sure
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I have a pack of balloons...
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My doge..
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The first true blood book and my remote... Pretty screwed
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Old laptop
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Pillow fight!
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An empty tank shell?
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@Sir rufflebottom. You have a dildo sir???
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Coloring pencils. Fear the colors of the rainbow!
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:D I has a metal baseball bat
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Pillow slap a bitch!!
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A seat belt... Damn
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A tuna sandwich..
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My little sister...
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A Gatorade bottle -_-
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Toilet paper
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i'll be throwing toilet paper, just like most of the people looking at this pic
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THE WORLD
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A sink... I'm screwed
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My machete was resting nicely by my left, so I'll be fine
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A pillow?
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A penny...
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I have a sword, a tomahawk, and a machete hanging on the wall to the left of me... I might make it... If i can decide which one to use in time
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my polypropelene Escrima Sticks? bring it on, zombie.
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A text
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@A ball, it Semites before I could finish typing. What it was was a textbook
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@A ball, submitted* I am just not having a good day
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@A ball, why does your autocorrect change it to Semites?!? Lol
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@bacontastic, I don't know
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A cordless drill...should do the trick.
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Pure steel ball
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A bread knife...
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Yes i got something pointy!
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Knife
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My PC should do the trick
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Well it ain't even my rig but it'll do a bunch of damage
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A car door...effective if I can get it off these hinges
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@Dick18, same
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A satellite dish that I'm building.
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A large box of knives... Sweet
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A chair... I'm not screwed at all!
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My cat?
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Ehhh not so much. I got a desk on my left.
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I have an electrical outlet, something to plug into it, and some Scissors. I think I'm safe.
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A desk
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I have a chair
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@The Gamesphere, are you sitting on the floor then? Lol
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@Imaginedragons, employee break room
*throws stripper* It's working!