No don't bite it, I want to hear your screams.
@ TouchMyCatEars, yeah they rolled a 1 they can’t do anything but take it
@ TouchMyCatEars, a woman after my own heart
@ TouchMyCatEars, no lube either
@ TouchMyCatEars, I don’t want anything in the butt in general!
@ TouchMyCatEars, Okay but when the neighbors ask if there was a dying walrus in our house last night then you get to explain it.
@DrSin, that's really hot
@Sterling M Archer, no, just your ass
@FaceGhost, hey, I'm a lady so I spit on it first
@megamanx181x, we had a deal! I let you now it's your turn!
@SimonPetrikov, why explain it when I can invite the neighborhood over and screen it for them? for a small fee, of course.
@ TouchMyCatEars, Hell yeah, movie night
@SimonPetrikov, you're a star now, bb!
@ TouchMyCatEars, hey. I follow the rules and of i got a shïtty roll I gotta deal with it, but no complaining when I get to tear it up
@ TouchMyCatEars, but you don’t even use foreplay!
@ TouchMyCatEars, a lady of good taste. 👌
If he didn’t already, wife her. Not many women allow this type of decision making.
This is why can't crit fail on ability checks
@Vanilla Ranger, if you can crit succeed you should be able to crit fail.
For example: walking up to a girl in the middle of the bar, suavely putting an elbow close to her to get attention. Quaffing your hair back, saying.
" hey there gorgeous, I got a race car bed back at home, we can make macaroni and cheese noise on it all we want. My mother is playing Bridge tonight."
@That one lurker, I don't know, sounds like they would have to swim out of there with how wet she probably got.
@That one lurker, Crit failing isn’t even a concept in 5e. People just like to homebrew it in. Closest thing is that if you roll a nat 1 on a death save you fail two death saves rather than one.
@DesignatedElfWhipper, that's one reason why I don't like it.
I don't like d20 games that much anymore, but it's so hard for people to get into the specialty games I have.
@That one lurker, I personally find crit failing an incredibly obnoxious concept. It implies that no matter how outlandishly skilled you become. A literal god slaying assassin wielding the dagger forged by the void that formed the universe, who performed feats so mind-bendingly impossible that they’ve permanently altered the course of the multiverse itself, there’s still just a 1/20 5% chance when you do ANYTHING that you’ll do a little slapstick routine and fall on your butt, or fumble your weapon. It’s just frustrating to players and adds nothing to the experience.
@DesignatedElfWhipper, that's why you never make the failure their fault.
If one of my players roll a 1 it's because the opponent did something either clever or unpredictable.
I.e. your example. Master assassin vs mr. Magoo.
Your uber trained bad@ss, has never fought a Kender before, so thinking that it was just unnormal gnome. The creature surprised him, by asking if this smock bomb was his. Once he stabs it by accident he needs to recoup and regain his posture.
Kenders are a breed of gnome, who "mysteriously" collects things that was lost in people's pockets. They're not thieves, it, just happens on occasion.
Making the results speak for themselves.
If it was a giant wyrm in a cavern, maybe your blow scared the wyrm to Dodge improperly. Slamming into the cave wall, dropping a stalactite on you.
Failure isn't always your fault. Think about the noble bard and persuasion check to get lucky. How the more memorable would it be that the bards pick up line accidentally reminded the gi
@That one lurker, rl about her dead father.
" Baby You Take My Breath Away"
" my dad used to like breathing."
Only if you bite me
Roll the dice again!
Any DM's want to share a cool plot/twist in their game?
I'll start: The BBEG of my homebrew campaign's current objective actually is helpful in maintaining the division of the various planes of existence (which will converge and utterly destroy eachother if nothing is done). Sure, they have nefarious means after the fact, but the players don't realize that they share a common goal with the BBEG, up until the army of the nine hells are able to seige the mortal realm.
Essentially, PC's think "BBEG? Got to stop their plan in its entirety!"
Actually, should only stop the second half of the plan.
Bite the pillow, I'm going in dry!