Wait, serious question and topic (mainly) for girls: But what gets you off? In the beginning of my relationship, my boyfriend would go down on me, and I couldn't finish. I mean he was great, but I just couldn't. And it frustrated him because it worked with the past. Anyway, I found what got me off was cowgirl. A simultaneous rubbing up against his pelvic while you know.... Hopefully this isn't too explicit. But I would like to know so maybe it could help.
@TheNoodleNapper, As a man who doesn't want to fvck up his first girlfriend (or maybe I do!). I would find this incredibly useful info!
@Dylanr Rordiagne, Well, honestly, I work for my orgasm. I mean, it has nothing to with my boyfriend. He's amazing! I just can't focus. When I'm on top of him, I chose the motion, how fast, slow, deep I'm going, and I have my eyes closed (whether it's light or dark) and I concentrate... I haven't found another way to finish. So yeah, people were all adults here comment up!
@TheNoodleNapper, my gf is the same way. She will close then says she goes numb. It wasnt until I let her take control that things got better for both of us
@Dknessfalls, That's actually how I feel. I go numb, sometimes I quiver. When my boyfriend goes down on me, I usually let it happen for a few minutes, then I tell him to let me get on top, and it's usually one or two... uh humps (?) And I'm done. But when he doesn't do that, that's when it becomes arduous. Glad to someone is like me. I really thought something was wrong.
@TheNoodleNapper, nah. Sometimes it hits you in the sweet spot and sometimes it dont. All depends on both of your moods and how long its been since youve done it. My gf and I r pretty open about all this, its how we keep satisfying each other
@Dknessfalls, Well thanks for sharing! That honestly made me feel a lot better.
@TheNoodleNapper, Personally, I just grab some of my wrinkles and wrap them around his long john then put it up in there
@Your Grandma, Stop being so detailed. It's making me hot.
@TheNoodleNapper, you win this time boner.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Lmao! Do you have any sexual experiences that might be helpful?
@TheNoodleNapper, nothing that hasnt already been said.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Is that you're way of confessing to not having any sexual encounters, other than with your hand by taking credit of what others have said? :/
@TheNoodleNapper, this is a possibility yes.
@TheNoodleNapper, ill own up i aint no bitch.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Meet me across the street at 14:00 hours, with nothing but a robe on and I'll be your experience.
@TheNoodleNapper, but its raining*le sigh* *puts on robe* *sits at door and waits for 14:00 hours*
@TheNoodleNapper, in all honesty if there is a person across the street from me at 2 just standing there i may be concerned or i may be horney. Whichever it is will depend on the mood.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Be scared.
@TheNoodleNapper, scared it is.
@TheNoodleNapper, Yea wow! I think I love you. But besides that. My preference is getting messy. I'm huge on whip cream and chocolate syrup. And basically have a chocolate fight, getting covered in it and then messing around. I guess it's pretty much a fetish. But for some reason doing that with a girl gets me off faster and harder than anything.
@Glavinator, dude you need to calm down a bit. Chocolate syrup is expensive. Maybe you just like the smell of the chocolate. And also that is such a cliché its not even funny.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Lol hey, hey! All suggestions, and advice and experience is welcomed! Lol
@TheNoodleNapper, well if you all will excuse me i need to go back in my hole. I am obviously not welcome here.
@Glavinator, Hahaha this sounds stupid, but I've actually used cake before. It was my ex. I crumbled up a slice "down there" and you know? I haven't tried whipped cream, even though my boyfriend is 6 years older than me, I feel as though he's kind of new at certain things. Like I've asked him about handcuffs, and bondage, and even like whipped cream. Hasn't tried any of it! I mean I'm the only girl who has dressed up for him on MULTIPLE occasions.
@CreepyPastaGuy, No. *grabs hair that is slightly poking out from hole* NoodleNapper welcomes all.
@TheNoodleNapper, jesus people i know there aren't supposed to but there are children on this app. You gonna have 15 year olds doing some kinky sh!t. Take it down a notch.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Are there really? Okay I will... Lol. I'm sorry!
@TheNoodleNapper, YOU FOOL THERE ARE ALWAYS CHILDREN. THEY SEE ALL HEAR ALL. THEY ARE EVERYWHERE!!!
@CreepyPastaGuy, Hey the first part was a joke and I was just explaining my fetish. But being a virgin it doesn't surprise me that you would be so offended. And I'm sorry that you got so jealous that I spoke to a girl that actually talked to u, even though it was on a funny pics app.
@Glavinator, you sir are an idiot. I cannot be seen communicating with you.
@CreepyPastaGuy, *raises hand slowly with terrified look* I'm a child
@Glavinator, Actually I think I tried whipped cream once with my ex. He didn't like it. I haven't tried it with my current boyfriend, yet. And let's not be hostile! (: Lol
@Your Grandmas Tits, hide yourself the adults are talking.
@CreepyPastaGuy, As a child and a virgin, of course, I regret reading every comment
@Your Grandmas Tits, this kid is going places. Most likely to therapy but still places.
@Your Grandmas Tits, with a username like yours, I'd think you'd get laid at least 4 times a day, and at least have 4-5 threesomes a week.
@TheNoodleNapper, that sounds like a life id like to live. Guess that means i gotta change my username. But what to?
@TheNoodleNapper, But I'm only 16 and I have a sense of humor that boys don't like very much. And no lays for me I don't like flowers much.
@TheNoodleNapper, Ahh that's unfortunate he didn't like it. Well good luck if you do try it with this one.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Ahhh good maybe you'll go away then.
@Your Grandmas Tits, few questions. Gay or female? What is your sense of humor? With these i could set you on a path to happiness. I may not look it but i give good advice.
@Glavinator, man you really are an ass. How you are in a relationship with that attitude, even if it is sarcastic, is beyond me.
@CreepyPastaGuy, I'm in fact female and I just make way too many inapropriate jokes sometimes. I live in a town full of guys with the mentality of the 1800's and girls who are sluts and then there is me
@TheNoodleNapper, im late to the party, but my fiancé love to be sub and me dom. Sometimes we switch it up, but that formula works great. A good position is facedown doggie.
@Your Grandmas Tits, hmmm interesting. Well not being a slut is a good start. The thing with the humor is you need to know when its the right time. If you do it to much and in the wrong situations it will end poorly. Other than that its just that you havent found the right person. And dont be afraid to ask him if you need to. In this day and age thats ok and in some cases needed.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Haha Okay ^u^ I haven't even had my first kiss yet so losing my virginity just seems kind of weird
@CreepyPastaGuy, Well you see Creepy man, you decided to be quite rude on a comment reply to me several comments above, while all I was doing was inputing information about myself that actually had somewhat to do with the conversation. I'm not this way to my girlfriend or other people mainly because they aren't rude to begin with.
@Glavinator, what are you talking about i was making a joke. Clearly it flew over your head. How was what i said rude? Then the first thing you do is attack me directly with my personal problems. You are just sick. It really disgusts me that people like you are around and just do these things without shame or regret.
@Your Grandmas Tits, i guess my first comment didnt go through. I pretty much said no need to rush do whatever you feel comfortable with. And just find someone who is right for you and treats you well.
@TheNoodleNapper, Ted: "Strange things are afoot at the comments section"
@Glavinator, Dah, this is sad people no need to fight here okay? It will honestly go nowhere and accomplish nothing. And @Your Grandmas Tits be yourself have fun and everything will play itself out just have fun for now and do not sweat the small stuff.
@Your Grandmas Tits, ME EITHER! I feel so relieved knowing that I'm not the only 16 year old girl who hasn't had their first kiss yet
@Your Grandmas Tits, I feel you. being the only cool person in town is difficult :/
@CreepyPastaGuy, OOHHHH that's what you meant! I'm sorry I'm stupid and it's like 4 in morning but I get it.
@Just a raccoon, Well...there are a few more cool people I was thinking broadly about the people at my school but not the rare others who are in fact like me.
@Your Grandmas Tits, do you like anime? If not you should start liking anime this instance.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Yes. That's a little random but I've seen most popular anime.
@TheNoodleNapper, have you tried fingers and tongue together? Hit the G spot with the fingers and the C with the tongue?
@Your Grandmas Tits, Welp if we lived near each other and I didn't already have a gf I would definitely be interested. I'm 17 by the way lol
@TheNoodleNapper, what gets me off is a Boston pancake.
@Dylanr Rordiagne, As a guy, I can tell you to simply ask questions. "Do you wanna do x" or "does x feel good to you?" It sounds stupid, and may even feel cliche to do so, but if you're girlfriend has any feeling toward the sexing-it-up aspect of your relationship, then she'll appreciate it. And tell your girlfriend she can do the same. Asking in general (non-sexual situations) I just generally a good idea.
@TheNoodleNapper, being eaten out has never done enough to make me orgasm. Due to depression and lots of different types of pain pills, I've lost a lot of sex drive. I stopped masturbating 3 years ago. I requested only about 1 out of 7 sex-sessions do I wish to orgasm with my boyfriend. So the rare times we agree to finish me off, I need one of two things... either a vibrator on my clitoris, or something in my butt. -_- Even without orgasming I still enjoy having sex with him, it always turns out to feel great.
@Dragondoot, I've told my boyfriend several times to do that. I told him to eat me while fingering me and he doesn't! I keep telling him that it's similar to when I jack him off and suck on his head! Use mouth and fingers. He asks me how he knows I know this. Well, when I masturbated to find this out, I fingered myself, and rubbed my C. But that's why I do cowgirl. His pelvis his wet because of my, so I run against that, plus he's inside me, so it feels great!
@TheNoodleNapper, next time he's down there just tell him to add fingers, and aim up kinda roughly towards the g-spot. This technique is how I figured out I'm a squirter. Only when it's extra-good.
@TheNoodleNapper, yea... I'm 14 so...
@Your Grandmas Tits, I too, have an inappropriate sense of humor and no one seems to like my jokes. I am a 15 year old guy btw.
@TheNoodleNapper, lol I guess I gotta try some of this stuff with my hand
@Your Grandmas Tits, Wat my grandma's tits are children?!? Everything I know is a lie
@Demenosthenes, your username, I like it
@Your Grandmas Tits, I would recommend not taking sex advice from creepy people on the internet, as well as not giving out personal information, especially as a younger child
@the2ndJaguar, I'm 14 too, but why are you just commenting that you are 14?
@TheNoodleNapper, I like it when they use the blades.
@Cpzombie, I was replying to her (Noodle) saying that because she didn't know there were kids on this app. But I forgot that my comment would still seem late so...
@the2ndJaguar, ah, that explains it XD
@TheNoodleNapper, my girlfriend really likes the being pinned down and somewhat choked while we have sexy time and it gets her off every time. But then again, everything gets her off. Sometimes she'll pull her legs up in the air and hold them there and it's quickest like that. But she really likes the pinned down and choked and rough stuff.
@TheNoodleNapper, you gave me a boner just reading that...
@TheNoodleNapper, It seems you're being too nice, I've noticed girls I've been with get off when they tell me what to do (idk what I'm doing most of the time anyway lol) and i think you should explicitly tell your partner what you want and for how long during sex, sometimes sex is about power for girls lol
@TheNoodleNapper, sometimes me and my girlfriend would do it and she'd finish with what I did to her(just kind of regular sex) but we haven't done that in a long time and when she "thinks about me" she always has a stronger orgasm than when I do stuff to her, so I don't know I guess do whatever works
@TheNoodleNapper, it took my gf and I a really long time to get to the finishing part of our sexualities, mainly because we agreed it wouldn't be smart to have sex and risk pregnancy in highschool! Anyways, it took me a month, but I just had to find her spots she liked. But I totally get the concentration thing, like if there's music or anything like tv or something it's almost impossible for me.
@Demenosthenes, so I read your comment as, he loves to be A sub, as in a sandwich. I don't know what you can do with that information, but it made me laugh
@TheNoodleNapper, you aint a cop is you?
@Your Grandmas Tits, hey there ;)
@TheNoodleNapper, pew pew
@Mynameisanonymous3, is it weird? I'm a dude who's 16 and I'm in the same boat
@The Amazing Potato, tell us a joke
@gettinitfosho, no of course not ... It's totally normal... And I hate when people hear that then automatically assume it's because I'm ugly... I'm not ugly I swear... It just hasn't been on my list of worries
@TheNoodleNapper, my girlfriend can finish just by me playing with her clitoris for five-ten minutes. It's supposedly the quickest method to achieving an orgasm, so definitely have your guy focus some energy there, and then doggy style always seems to please! Be safe though, don't be silly, protect your willy!
@Mynameisanonymous3, Yeah it hasn't been my top priority either. I've had chances to have a girlfriend before, I just did't because I felt like I wasn't ready for one yet. That and I had a lot of confidence issues when I was younger.
@TheNoodleNapper, "You must be 17+ to use this app" but back to the point, what got my gf off was control. Either she was doing everything or I was being forceful after we already started stuff. The 1 time she finished before me, she thought I did inside her and was freaking out for the rest of the month xD
@TheNoodleNapper, When you say he "goes down" on you, do you mean he gets on top during the kanoodling process, or are you talking about oral? I'm still a virgin, and I plan on doing oral during my first time to get her excited, but if it doesn't work for everyone, I'd like to know.
@gettinitfosho, Exactly! But it's ok. We'll get it someday I promise! (lol I feel like a motivational speaker)
@Mynameisanonymous3, haha yeah I'm getting there. Good luck to you too
@BIGHEAD2783, I've been using this app since I was like 12
@SimonPetrikov, I mean oral.
@TheNoodleNapper, Good to know, thank you
@xSparkySharky, Yeah. Don't be afraid to get in there and feel around lol!
@Laser Shark Robot, Really? And you're a guy..? Lol I thought nut was easy for men regardless of location. I mean, my boyfriend could bust a nut if there's a rock concert outside. But that's exactly how I am! Everything has to be turned down... my eyes are closed. And I found that if he plays with my breasts while I'm on top, it helps achieve it faster.
@Relator, I do! But I think it destroys his pride because his way worked in the past. And he's even said "You're not like them". It hurts, but... Ya. Well, in the past he did. But I've told him, because he's asked and then he doesn't. Lol. I'm five months pregnant, and I seriously, (because of how exhausting it can get) cannot reach an orgasm until I have my baby. I'm like dead tired.
@TheNoodleNapper, there's a reason women have harder times having an orgasm and its because for women it's all about your mental state at the moment, for guys it's 90% physical. If you have an easier time orgasming when you're eyes are closed, it's most likely due to, and I mean no offense by this in any way, an insecurity. Everyone has insecurities but for some women they can get in the way. It's all about being comfortable with yourself. That's why for my advice to the fellow guys here ill just say to give your girlfriend as many compliments as possible while having sex if you really care about her satisfaction. It's not needed but it never hurts to make a girl feel a little better about herself. Positioning is important too but that's the easy part and that varies based on the girl. For you, noodlenapper I'd just say to focus on the pleasure at the moment and try to let go a little(easier said than done). If this helps, then I'm not sorry for the long post.
@TheNoodleNapper, oh yeah! Especially of there's a movie on I'll start to focus on that and my girlfriend is hot and everything it's just like I have sexual ADD. But she loves my hands, pretty much anything I can do with them helps her out
@A Grammar Jew, no, no you're fine! I mean, nobody get sentimental on me, but I was molested when I was younger, and my boyfriend has been the only guy to care if I reach an orgasm. And at 19 years old, I swear, I was like "Girls have orgasms?". Lmao. And he said "Figure out what you like." And I'm sitting there like "Uh, explain to me what you mean." Lmao. And I don't think it's an insecurity, I think it was insecurities stopping me from orgasming in the beginning. That's how I've always been. My boyfriend was kind curious too, and I said, "It's like me reading a book. I would have to read the same sentence over and over if there were distractions, but if there are none, I can finish."
@A Grammar Jew, Oh, and he said in the beginning "You have to think it pretty much." And I'm like "Think what?! My head is blank." I think it was because he was the only.guy who cared, plus my past that shocked me. Like my mind, was black. I tuned out everything. He told me "You're supposed to feel a connection." And I told him everything turned off during sex. Except my vajayjay of course. But then he eased my way into everything. And even though he was frustrated in the beginning, he worked with me.
@TheNoodleNapper, First off, congrats on your pregnancy! Secondly, despite all the pop-psychology people are offering it does hold a morsel of truth, it might seem you're just too focused on him and the orgasm, yet not on the act itself. Enjoy your partner, work on bringing as comfortable and as intimate with him as you can, it doesn't have to be black and white when it comes to sex and you don't always need to hit a home run when playing baseball.
@Relator, That's what I've told him. He said going down on girls in the past finished them, and I've told him to just go down on me and think of it as the beginning. It doesn't have to be the big finale. And yeah, I'm getting better at all of it. I think everyone is still discovering has room to discover their sexual preferences and desires and such. I just started searching a little later in my sexual career.
And thank you so much!!
@Laser Shark Robot, Hahaha I guess I have that too. I hear one noise that isn't caused by sex, I have to do everything I can to get my head back in the game! Glad to know I'm not the only one.
@ArmoredDildo, Lol everything? She must be one of the ones who don't take much at all! Lucky girl and YOU! Haha. But that's kinky! I'm thinking after this pregnancy, my Love and I are going to go do some shopping to spice things up!
@TheNoodleNapper, I just read one of your previous comments, I'm sorry that you had to endure that, but I hope you are speaking to a professional about it. That may actually have a lot to do with your situation, I've worked with many women who've been abused and unless they speak about it, anything having to do with sexuality can be overly frustrating and complicated for them.
@Relator, Oh my gosh don't say sorry or any of that! Lol I did go to therapy... For 8 years!! If you asked me, I overstayed my welcome, and I blame my mom for that. I think therapy made me more submissive. And I think therapy made me feel like I was the victim in anything and everything. Without therapy, when I left it, I was able to forgive, move on, and talk to the person who did as if it never happened. Haha yeah, I was frustrated when my boyfriend was digging into me about that, but he helped me, too.
@TheNoodleNapper, That's awesome that you went, though! A very difficult step, indeed. It is unfortunate it couldn't help you the way it should, perhaps the therapist? I've seen people make amazing progress more often than not. Did I read correctly that are still around your abuser?
@Relator, Well he was my brother. And he has a daughter, so I'd like to be around her! Hmm, I don't want to blame the therapist. I just think 8 years was too long. I think 2 years max. If anything happened, my mom called immediately to set up an earlier appointment than what was already set, and it kind of made therapy the thing to fall back on when I felt weak... And that happened for 8 years, ya know?
@TheNoodleNapper, I don't know if you are familiar with RAINN? I know it may sound intimidating at first, but if you go on rainn.org or call 1800-656-HOPE they have many services like showing local group counseling that can help. You're in a particular situation, but I'm confident they can help, even if it's just lending an ear, because they are available 24/7.
@Your Grandmas Tits, if it makes you feel any better, I'm and 18 year old girl, and I've yet to have my first kiss as well. That's because I'm a socially awkward spaz though.. Haha.
@Your Grandmas Tits, I just thought that I'd let y'all know that reading those comments was the most useful 30 minutes I've ever spent. XD
@TheNoodleNapper, crap I sent it to the wrong user name, I meant to say. "I just thought I should let y'all know that I just spent the most useful and informative 30 minutes of my life reading your comments, and thank you (to everyone on this comment stream) for the extremely useful advice/tips. XD
@Double A Ron , Hehe! Go, go and use these tips and never look back.
@TheNoodleNapper, We're not all adults here...
@Ribby, Don't worry this thread is pretty much over.
@TheNoodleNapper, omg it goes on for ever!!! I will avert my gaze to avoid being corrupted :P
@Ribby, hahah way too late for the most of the ones on this thread.
@CreepyPastaGuy, *Takes notes on all of the above*
@Your Grandmas Tits, What kind of sense of humor? I'm curious
@Lover of Waffles, Inapropriate (I don't think I spelled that right but oh well)
@Mynameisanonymous3, well,21 male here. Virgin and no first kiss. Just waiting for the right person:)
@Your Grandmas Tits, CAN ANYONE SAY LEMON PARTY?
@theVozhd, LEMON PARTY?
@Your Grandmas Tits, GOOGLE IT. I DARE YOU.
@theVozhd, Well, it looks like it's time to stab my eyes with knives.
@TheNoodleNapper, I've found that doggy style is a sweet angle if you want it deep, but it makes me arms kinda numb with the ecstasy, so I usually put my legs on his shoulders, sideways kinda, that way it rubs my clitoris at the same time
@Comment Stalker, I like that! We'll try that(:
@Mynameisanonymous3, the point being when you click to install funnypics you have to agree that you are 17+... there's plenty of pics here where it's a childish joke/pic and top comment is making fun of the agreement to being 17+...
@TheNoodleNapper, my gf is nuts for cowgirl. for a guaranteed orgasm, while you two are doing the dirty, tell him to rub your clit. Combo of smashing into eachother, and little circles with a well placed thumb, incredible. Or if you're feeling brave you can do it yourself?
@Anass Rhammer, Hmmm, that sounds good! I love all these helpful advice! I mean cowgirl itself gets me off really quick, but nothing wrong with adding a little something more to it (:
@HoneyNuttedCheerios, I'm sure this is super old and no one will see... but, I am a female and getting a guy off is my thing. Giving blow jobs is... Wow. I love it. I also like to tease and say no as long as possible till he just takes over and it gets rough.
@HoneyNuttedCheerios, I'm a guy and the mental noise is my biggest problem as well. I find focusing on my partner's needs to be very soothing. It's like having a mission, and I become more present. Then I can take care of myself too, more often than not. Good luck to you!
Completely forgot what the picture was. Read the entire conversation about sex
@Nagato Uzumaki, as did the majority of funnypics users
@Nagato Uzumaki, when I read the first line of your comment I thought the next picture had to do with The Silence
Charles Xavier disagrees
@Skuppy, i feel bad that your brilliant comment went unnoticed. I will give you an upvote.
@CreepyPastaGuy, Well at least I got some recognition. Perhaps if I liked my own comment to put it on the radar, but that's a b*tch move to most people.
Can't relate, guy and a virgin.
@H20 Delirious, I relate and I'm 19.
Never had a boyfriend so...
@Shawn and Gus, Challenge accepted.
21 June 2014 #21June2014
*Fake orgasms uncontrollably*
Did I just read a conversation about girls talking about the down and dirty? This truly is the best community.
@NocPatt, Yes, yes you did.
That girl makes me want to real orgasm, if you know what I mean.
@Conman33, I'm don't know what you mean. Please demonstrate. *Bean face*
@Conman33, I agree. My gf has those type of glasses as well. Thought it was her at first from the thumbnail
@Dknessfalls, well if she ever tries to fake an orgasm, then you have the perfect picture to send her.
@Conman33, tries? There is no try. We keep going until she can longer fake it, or til I get sleepy
If no one knows? How many people are you faking it with?
Ok does every one just run around like animals u ppl r stupid !!!
@Lobster Belkin , *you, *people, *are, oh, and *everyone (no spaces). But what are you talking about?
"Ladies, if there's something that really makes you hot...how about FILLING US IN AS TO WHAT THE FVCK IT IS?!" -Sam Kinison.