A little edgy even for me but whatever
I once thought running, suicide, or murder were the only options. The only thing that kept me back was my Mom. I couldn't leave her with my Dad alone. I couldn't let her go through losing one of her sons. Same with running away, or killing my father.
And lastly, who would really win? I'd just prove the world I'm weaker than my father, or I'd throw away my life. Suicide would only show him that he won. I wish that he'd care, that he'd realize he was wrong. But no, he'd think that I was weak. And everyone else would too.
I thought maybe I didn't matter. In the end, everyone dies, everyone forgets you, and you'll just be dust. But the ignorant don't know this. They live their lives thinking they're important. My mother does the same. Even if I thought all was pointless, she didn't.
I decided my point is to exist to protect my mother and her world, and show my father was wrong.
I hope this helps you find your reason to exist too.
@Tentastic, happy new year!
@Wappa, *elbows Wappa in group of commenters* psst... dude, this guy just poured his heart out man. I mean I appreciate your enthusiasm and all but ya know... maybe not the right timing for it.
@Tentastic, you are very smart and strong. I hope you can find nothing but happiness in the future. Or I hope happiness finds you. 💙
@Tentastic, you have my respect for staying so strong. I don't know if I could do it.
@A Flying Panda, whenever I read or hear stories like this I never know what comforting words to say, so knowing this community I decided to say what someone wouldn’t think of that he might actually enjoy, no malice intended
@Tentastic, I relate to this more than I wish I did.
@Wappa, dude i laughed so hard
@Wappa, you know that meme of Pikachu throwing a bucket of water at raging flames, thinking he’s helping but he’s really not? Yeah, that’s you right now
@Tentastic, the way i look at it, coming from the background i have is that i'm here on this Earth to prove that there can be incredible parents out there. Parents who do the right thing, never harm or abuse their children, but protect them and teach them. Finding your own journey is important, and while protecting your mother is a noble one, you need to make sure you find something self fulfilling, and productive. Don't put your focus onto another. I started working out so i could protect my mom from my father, but my goal wasn't to protect my mother. It was to never let anyone i care about get hurt again. If you ever need to talk, let me know. I come from a similar situation. You're not alone.
@Tentastic, It's really sad what you went through bro. I hope you find happiness in the future and darkness of bad times goes away from your life
@Tentastic, i've been in a similar situation man. Father was a piece is shhhiiii.. it's really a lot to say and i don't want to take light away from you. You're a hero in my book.
@Tentastic, Thank you. Really. Thank you.
@Tentastic, with me, it was my mother. She mentally, emotionally, and verbally abused me my entire childhood. The best advice I could give you is to be aware of the patterns of behavior you learned from your father, including the opposite ones. Don’t let the fear of becoming him rule your life, nor the attempt to avoid that to limit you. Look for the middle ground and you will thrive. I wish you the best in all you do, and remember you’re never alone.
@Tentastic, I did the same for pretty much the same reasons. You can always choose what and how you want to be. Great work!
@Tentastic, yo. You good man?
@Tentastic, my reason, is to prove I'm not him, and provide my children the childhood I didn't get.
So ultimately, my reason is firstly me, to be the best men and a better man that that POS could ever hope to be, and to be the best dad I can for my kids.
@Tentastic, My friend, I was in that position too. But please listen humbly as I say that I was wrong and so are you.
It isn't that death makes life worthless, it's just that you haven't lived a life worth living yet. Your point of view is arrogant and skewed, just like mine was. You think you know everything there's to know about the world, because you indeed are smart. But you are not smart enough to see that others live happily--not because they are ignorant--but because they found a meaningful way to live.
You have tremendous potential! You are just ignoring a lot of stuff that is wrong with you. You are not all that you can be, so fix this! And do it for yourself, not your mom or dad. Learn to be brave enough to live without them and despite them! You'll find your point then. Don't try to find your point in the middle of the mess you are going through. That's what's skewing your point of view. Sorry if I'm harsh, but sometimes we need someone to give our head a shake.
Can’t relate. I have an awesome father. Now my mother on the other hand...
This is gonna be how the Jewish people will react once I come back
@Bad Boi Jesus, How many times do we have to teach you this lesson old man?
@injit, you can never stop me I am Jesus muthafvcking christ
@Bad Boi Jesus, if you keep dying for people sins I’m not gonna live much longer
@DrSin, I’ll be having your doctorate then
Is it bad that I don’t remember most of my childhood?
@benderama, You aren’t one of those synths are you?
@Bad Boi Jesus, synths?
@benderama, I hope not because I’m the same
I don't....uhm....the uploader name fits
@SpyroTheBabyDwagon, damn right it does. I got jokes edgier than the knife I used to cut myself.
Mine did both by the time I was 7 so 🙃🤔
I raised you tough for the real world damn it!
accidental downvoting is a great start to the year