Take it to dinner somewhere nice, not necessarily five star but above Quiznos for sure. Give it a nice kiss when I drop it off at home, not creepy long but enough to keep the thing interested. I'll wait a few days before calling, but with a valid excuse. Tell it I would really like to see it again and that I had a great time last time. Slowly make it fall for me over the years, no high school kiddy love I'm talking make "The Notebook" look like "Twilight" love. On our wedding day, when it finally gets ready to to give in and fully embrace our love, show up with another demon/animal hybrid and break it's heart beyond repair with no explanation. That'll teach it to sneak into my house while I'm asleep.
@xmarksdeathx, sorry if that's weird. I'm pretty drunk, y'all have a good safe night though and thanks for being an awesome community!
@xmarksdeathx, not weird to me, but I'm drunk too so what do I know! Brb gonna go make a pizza
@Dr Mechanoid, The pizza is what my boys and I make whenever we got to doing the drinkin. It just tastes so damn good
@xmarksdeathx, this is a win in my books
@xmarksdeathx, woah, dude.
@xmarksdeathx, woah. Calm down there, Satan.
@xmarksdeathx, most people would set it on fire, you'd make it want to set itself on fire *bows
@xmarksdeathx, if this is the level of creativity you reach while drunk.... get drunk more often!
@Mark Twains ghost, Mark Twain's ghost is right! Drink more, be more smarter.
@xmarksdeathx, You are an awesome kind of drunk.
@SCBeauty1983, I was just about to comment that!
@xmarksdeathx, I don't think even I shjt you not had gotten the top TWO comments on a single pic before.
@iOS10, happens all the time
@iOS10, hey thanks man. I haven't really commented much because I didn't think people would enjoy my sense of humor, but it was actually really nice to see that I got it. I freaked out telling my girlfriend about it and explaining the app haha. Just glad to help contribute to the entertainment!
@iOS10, yeh I've done it a couple of times. But still, an impressive feat.
@xmarksdeathx, calm down Nero
@Fantabulous Toaster, afraid I don't quite understand the reference, so I'll just act like I totally understand *coughs nervously while shuffling note cards* "lol"
@xmarksdeathx, guy who made Christians into candles for a garden party. Sounds like a Pinterest hack- probably isn't.
@Fantabulous Toaster, well thank you for the Fantabulous information
@xmarksdeathx, that might just be the greatest thing I have read on here ever
@xmarksdeathx, This is one of the greatest things I've ever read
@ItsPronouncedYiff , hey thanks man. So was that. Thanks for being a great person and taking time to say hi 😊
Catch it because I'm not particularly afraid of it. Turn it in and recieve a hefty sum of money, and if I'm luck some money and love for several scientific and humanitarian organizations. Carefully invest that money into several compound IRAs and into various stock at varying levels of risk. Build a house and a shop. Fabricate some days. Read philosophical fiction and play video games by night. Under the house I'd have a small lab were I could toy around with plants, and trying to make the sustainable in various environments, hopefully with relative success. Probably never marry. Maybe travel some. Then maybe kill myself.
Pet it. Seems cute and cuddly!
@Psykotik,I'd pet my own conda then wrestle it with the creature!!!
Wonder who got into my house and left a photoshopped pic of a spider-snake on my floor.
All it needs now is wings and a scorpion tail. All I need is a flamethrower to set myself on fire!
BURN THE ENTIRE FVCKING HOUSE DOWN!!! KILL IT KILL IT!
Keep it as a pet... my two favourite animals in one
And we're swiping....
Burn everything. Including self.
What do I do? Realize this app is now Facebook and delete it
Oh this get uploaded, but not my Polandball comic!?
For shame Stuckpixel.
Throw it my wife and jump out the fvcking window.
Grab it by the pu##y
Let it kill me and welcome the sweet embrace of death.
@notinthenews, dude same
Wake up to from whatever hellish nightmare i was dreaming about
I'd keep it as a pet
Smash the head then skin it to make a belt.
Call the police and beg them to shoot the fvcking thing.
Buy a one way train ticket to nopesville... DUH!
Call the police and say if theay don't get here in 1 minute in order to get this thing to a lab to be studied then I am going flipping burn my house to the ground and bury the remains in a chest and burn that....
SCREAM LIKE A BITCH!!!
Burn the house. Say "goodbye world" then die.😐
Go to Mars
STOMP STOMP STOMP
Take picture and call a biologist
Grab my nope shotgun and screwthat machete to beat and shoot the crap out of it.
Work out what it eats, how it lives etc. Keep it as a pet! 😍😊 And don't give it to that one ginger scientist woman who killed David the Giant Worm.
I question whether the nukes fell over Straya
Call a zoologist
Puts ma dick in it
Cry myself till i die
Mail it back to Australia.