AMAZlNG SPlDERMAN 16040 points

AMAZlNG SPlDERMAN

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@Anonymous Jack III, but you have heard of him on Funny Pics (Upvotes: 74)
@NormMcDonaldHadAFarm, one time in 6th grade I was really really sick. Like the runs kind of sick. I didn't want to go to the bathroom though because fvck those school bathrooms. This was first period, mind you. So I'm holding it...holding it...holding it. And finally, I could not take it any, holy Jesus Christ, it all came out. Right there, in my chair. Not the solid type. I mean that kind where even your farts feel liquid. That nasty, warmness just spread all across my butt cheeks and all I could do was just sit there. I thought, "omg, everyone knows" but nobody even looked at me. So I immediately got up and told my teacher if I could go home because I didn't feel well. Some kid said, "no he's lying!" But my teacher said, "no, he's a good kid. I believe him" so I grabbed my stuff and went to the office, shjt smeared all over my butt. I go in the office and call my mom. The lady tells me to take a seat and I just said, "no, I'm okay, thanks". My mom finally came and took me home. on Poop Stories (Upvotes: 54)
That's why they say "dress for the slide, not the ride". Imagine that happening to your face...your nose? Gone. Your djck? Gone. Your entire lower body? Gone. on Funny Pics (Upvotes: 53)
We already knew he drove a Honda but he didn't talk about it, "for he did not speak of his own Accord" (John 12:49) on Funny Pics (Upvotes: 70)
At the end it's all like "blahgajagahablptltptltptltpblbt" on hydraulic press (Upvotes: 42)

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