Dex the Lumberjack 122746 points

Dex the Lumberjack

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I am truly honored to be part of this, thank you on God bless (Upvotes: 100)
I'm really curious why she has a mug that says that. on Funny Pics (Upvotes: 95)
He lets you down off the wall. He carries you upstairs to his bed. You make fiery love that night. You begin to date. He can change you tell yourself; he won't always be a killer After a year, you get engaged. Then you get married. You adopt a couple of kids and grow old together. Then, late one night, he takes you into the basement of your ranch house in the suburbs. There are bodies down there. He never stopped. Now you're an accomplice because you've known this whole time. You break down in tears on your knees. "How could you do this to me?" You ask. He sighs. He tells you there's more. What more could there be you wonder. How much worse could this get. He looks at you for a second before his skin begins to peel off. What's happening? A slimy skin reveals itself underneath. On his head there are two bulging eyes and whiskers. "I have a confession," he blubbers out. You weep on the ground. He looks at you, flapping his fins uncontrollably. "I'm a catfish." THE END on Funny Pics (Upvotes: 80)
Goes on Tinder date with a great girl, can't believe she's single, things are going great. Suddenly, everything starts to grow blurry. You fade out of consciousness. When you come to, you wake up in your bed; it was all a dream. Except this is not your bed, this is a concrete wall. And you're not laying down, you're chained against the wall. Where are you? You don't remember. Then the girl comes in. She's carrying a bullwhip. You realize you're naked. In the dim light of the room, you can see bodies of other men all around. The girl comes closer to you. You quickly realize that she's a man. He scowls at you, preparing to finish you off. This is it. This is the end. He cracks the whip at you. It hits you in the balls. You realize that this is your fetish "harder daddy," you moan. The man stops, he stares at you perplexed for a second before taking off his wig, dropping the whip, and coming up to you. You two begin to kiss. The passion resonates through the dank cellar... on Funny Pics (Upvotes: 78)
You might be an idiot on Funny Pics (Upvotes: 78)

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