Shmay Fish 7753 points

Shmay Fish

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@GoldBurner, you won't find anyone on this app who is antivax because it requires a certain amount of brain cells to know how to operate a smart phone. on Funny Pics (Upvotes: 67)
Is he jacking off on the dog grave on Zombie Love (Upvotes: 53)
"Pleaaaase we're an independent publisher and need the revenue!" "Ok, fine" *turns off adblock* *immediately gets 5 pop ups, 4 Trojan viruses, 3 single moms, 2 new tabs, and a partridge in a pear tree* on Funny Pics (Upvotes: 43)
Reminds me of a story. So, my cat is really into canned tuna (shocker) and it got to the point that even the click of the can opener attaching to any can would send her running from anywhere in the house to the kitchen to beg me for a morsel. One day, I was about to open some tuna and noticed her sleeping on a chair nearby. Not wanting to deal with her whining (i usually gave her tuna anyway) i devised a clever method of hiding the "click" sound. Just as it clicked, I hollered, "WHAM!!" at the top of my lungs. This had the intended effect of masking the sound but also sent her flying into the air out of surprise and tearing out of the room. I ate all the tuna. on title (Upvotes: 34)
@El Batman, my girlfriend is from quebec and french is her first language. She doesn't forget words too often in English but she has interesting tics based in trying to translate literally from french. For example, she says "close the tv" instead of turn off, or, "what is that, already?" Instead of "what is that, again?" Because in french you would say "Qu'est-ce que c'est déjà?" ( déjà = already). She also loudly declares me as her "lover " in public because it just means S.O. to her. Her lexicon is pretty large so it surprises me when she isn't familiar with some words, like "soot", "hustle" or idioms like "play it by ear." But she's been teaching me french for a while now so I can't really judge her haha... on Sea Bug (Upvotes: 32)

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